Dark and Concealed

Hey Web,

I'm currently feeling unease. I knew, she didn't like me. I thought she was also my friend. But no, she isn't like that in my impression. I don't understand either.

I think I'm back from being stupid. I'll only get hurt if I keep on doing this. Just like the old days. When I'm still approachable. When I like having many friends. I'd rather be isolated than having a lot of friends and make me look like a fool. I was their laughing stock. I was their clown. Because my personality looks like that. I'm even addressed as lesbian. I look like a boy. What can I do, I don't want to lose my friends.

But, I became like this. I realized that I was really a fool. If I have been more serious, more physically and mentally strong, I wouldn't have to experience that. I changed myself my personality, my looks, I become more conscious. I had my thoughts to be obscured.

I like this me. This is the better one.

Alexithymia

Dear Webbie!

Hi!

I've been having this experience. Maybe I'm inspired? I know what I've been everytime I took glance unto that thought I've been keeping on feeling that. I'm happy, satisfied, or thankful, I don't know if that would describe it.

Thankful though, that it helps me in some ways. Maybe, if I continue this I wouldn't miss anything and I'll gain something I do hope.

Greatly, I have to be happy. I know this helps.

Win over

Dear Web,

I remembered my last post here, (it was deleted though, crap me) I've been practicing my coldness at that time. I prefer to be alone. I never had intimate friends here. Even when I'm at AUP, I'm satisfied of being alone.

I could easily go to the cafeteria and eat alone. But here, I couldn't do that, they would label me as loner or different.

Maybe one of the reasons why as what I see in myself now, I'm diffident, or sometimes (frequently >_<) insecure. But I could conquer it, if I want to.

I have this current friend here that at first when I saw her, I feel intimidated I tried to approach her but afterwards, she approached my and initiate our closeness. My insecurity was gone. She is now my close friend. Or rather my only close friend, and I'm thankful for that. I directly saw how I conquered my weakness.

I hope not only to her. Because of some girls, I feel intimidated but I can't win to my fear because they have this "we-can't-be-close-aura". I don't know what to do.

I wan't to. I really want to.

New week

Magandang araw! Web,

Another week has passed. Done with my exams. At last. I could breathe. :D

Maybe now I'll just sleep or browse internet then wash my clothes. :3

Geez. I would like to rest more and more haha. I feel so relieved~

Good day. ^_^

Unsafe world

Dear Web,

My best friend here told me that someone in our place back home got into an accident. I was very scared of the story. I seldom here this in reality. Never seen and got into that kind of accident. She got hit by a truck while riding a motor and here head got off her body..

I'm pursuing a medical course, and I'm aware that personally, I can see that kinds of bodies.

I don't want to see but, I have to conquer my fear. I am fully aware of that. I hope I could get over it. And I hope that wouldn't happen to anyone, especially to my friends.

As my mom told us, that we just have to pray always. Be careful.

-Zz

Hello

Hi! Webbie,

I'm back! Still have one exam tomorrow though. I'm hungry haha.
Happy Sabbath. I've been doing nothing since this week, maybe because I don't have classes that's why.

But, I have exams. And my Anatomy exam, the 16 pages. -__-

It's okay. :)

I miss posting here thouugh.
HAHA~ see you.

-Zz

Looking forward.

Sunday.

Tomorrow is another day. :D

Mondaaaays. Back to studies again. :)

Anatomy and Physiology. Organic Chemistry and Cell and Molecular Biology.

Trying. My ceiling.

ERROR

WEBIEEEEE~~~

MY PAST POSTS ARE DELETED. Accidentally :( </3

Why this blogger doesn't have archive so that I can republish my old posts :(

HUHUHU~ I miss my diary XD

I'm idiot. errrrrrr. :((((

About me.

ZOPIANO stand for Zariz (my name) + Soprano (my voice range) + Piano (my musical instrument)

Facts about ZOPIANO

Height: 163 cm
Weight: 119 lbs
Blood Type: A

- Born on August 28, 1996.
- I'm a Seventh-day Adventist Christian.
- I love singing and playing piano.
- I like to play basketball I was influenced by my Dad since I was a kid.
- I originally don't like cockroaches, worms, or any exotic animals, I'm afraid of it. But since, college I conquered my fear.
- I love ice cream, especially vanilla and cookies and cream.
- I sometimes teach piano lessons if I want to.
- I like eating vegetables, but I don't like eggplant, it makes me throw up.
- I love reading books, English novels or Filipino novels, especially dystopian genres.
- My ideal man is a musician. I'm nearly attracted to a guy who can play piano/guitar or any instrument well.
- I'm a yellow baby that's why after two days when I was born I stopped breastfeeding and used cow's milk while I'm left in nursery section.
- I don't have piercings, it is forbidden in our religion.
- I don't eat pork, shrimp, and crabs, it's also forbidden in our religion.
- I'm allergic to dust.
- When I was in 1st grade, I suffered from Primary Hand Complex, good thing that we'd treated it immediately.
- I love Mathematics and Music.
- I really love color green.
- I'm taking up Bachelor in Medical Laboratory Science. I want to be a BACTERIOLOGIST someday.

Random things agaaiin~

Hey webbie,

I'm just thinking about something but I don't know how to express it. HAHA.

What should I do now? :)

But, wah I know this is great. I feel relieved because of some things.
Thank God. This is my first time. XD

This is so random. LALALALALALA~ BLABLABLABLA~

Oyasumi~ XD

-Zariz